"The flower that follows the sun does so even on cloudy days." -Robert Leighton

Friday, April 24, 2009

Just Thought You Should Know...

Our Sweet Baby

Today was the day
we were going to meet you.
The ultrasound appointment was set.
For 12 weeks I was the only one to cradle you
now no one else can.
Our families and friends didn't even know you were there.
We had planned to wait and surprise them.
Instead of announcing the day of your coming
they will hear of our loss instead.
I cried all night at the thought
of losing a little one so dear.
I loved you already and didn't want you to go.
Now miscarriage is another word for fear.
Such pain and such anguish!
I didn't want to believe it!
We will never forget you or stop loving you.
Somedays there is deep peace and comfort.
Other days nothing but pain and sorrow.
Your 12 week existence will never be in vain,
you have united our family in ways we can't explain.
Losing you in springtime will always remind me
of a promise told long ago.
Just like the trees and flowers
who shine with all their glory after a long winter's nap,
someday we will see those arms wiggle
and your eyes will bear witness of an eternal plan
made possible by our loving Savior, Jesus Christ.
Goodbye our sweet baby, enjoy your heavenly home
for we shall meet again.

--With Love, Your Mother & Father
4/23/09

12 comments:

Jenny said...

Oh Tanya...I know saying sorry doesn't really help with these situations, but know that you're in my prayers. Your poem is beautiful, it made me cry!

Mandy said...

Tanya, I'm so sorry you had to go through this. I'm sure you probably feel better because you shared this. Your poem is beautiful. I know I always feel a little better when I can talk about things. I'm so glad that you called me yesterday. I really hope that I was able to help you. I just want you to know that I'm so grateful for your friendship. I consider you one of my best friends. I want you to know that my thoughts and prayers are with you.

Greg and Torrey said...

tanya, thank you for having the courage to share your baby's loss on your blog. i am saddened that this baby could not have stayed longer, but there's always a reason. 12 weeks was all your baby needed. i pray that you find comfort in your pain, that you find fullness in your children that are in your arms today... and i pray that the lord's plan will quickly unfold for your family. what a beautiful poem so pure and raw. i'm glad you are allowing yourself to mourn this child because he / she is your child... you may not hold him / her in this earthly life. but you will hold your baby one day. i love you and ben. you are beautiful parents. amazing people. may your sadness be replaced with peace and compassion... and gratitude... his blessings will come. you'll see. i love you, my sweet friend.

Beth said...

I know that there is nothing I can say to make it better. Just please know that you and your family are in our thoughts and prayers. I must say that from my own miscarriages, that I am so thankful of the knowledge that we have because of the Gospel, and being sealed as a family. We love you.

Barbi said...

Dear Tanya and Ben,

Know that we are praying for you; may our Lord bless you with the strength you need at this time. Let Him comfort you in your pain. Know that all will be well. We love you.

Barbi and Wil

Flem said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Flem said...

Beautiful poem to express this. I am sorry for your loss.

The Griffins said...

Tanya! I am so sorry for you and your cute family. Times like these make me so grateful for the gospel. I hope you know how cared for you truly are- and how cared for your sweet little will be. I miss you and our talks! You're the greatest. Keep your chin up sweetie.

Lyndi said...

Tanya, that was such a beautiful poem. It perfectly expresses what every parent goes through who has had to deal with that struggle. It brought tears to my eyes and reminded me of the promise of forever families. Our thoughts and prayers are with you and your family.

dorothy said...

That was so beautiful, Tanya. It brought me to tears. What an amazing talent you have to bring such expression to your sorrow. Thank you for sharing that. You are such an amazing example of strength and faith. Know that I think and pray for you often!

Melissa said...

You made me cry Tanya...I had no idea and my heart goes out to you and Ben. I do not know what it is like to lose a little one...losing my brother recently gives me some insight on what a struggle it is to lose someone you love and what peace we can find in knowing we will be reunited. We love you!
The Brady Family

Colby said...

What a beautiful poem! You have been in our thoughts and prayers ever since we heard. It's times like these it's easier to realize just how great the gospel is.