9. Create!

My whole life I always thought and believed I didn't have any talents.  There was nothing I was good at.  There was nothing I could do well.  Thinking those thoughts sure makes a person feel worthless.  I feel like I have spent most of my life admiring the talents of others and wishing I had those same talents.  It wasn't till a few years ago that I actually came to the realization that I could draw and do crafts well.  I have always enjoyed doing those things-but I never thought anything of it.  Last summer I came across this quote from a Visting Teaching Message in the Ensign magazine: 

“Lifelong learning is essential to the vitality of the human mind, body, and soul. It enhances self-worth and self-actuation. Lifelong learning is invigorating mentally and is a great defense against aging, depression, and self-doubt” (“The Journey of Lifelong Learning,” in Brigham Young University 2008–2009 Speeches [2009], 2, 8–9).

I think developing one's talents is lifelong learning.  This last year as I have fought depression every waking moment, it wasn't till I reviewed my 1300 photos that I realized one more blessing in my life...finding enjoyment in 'creating' things.  Each time I made something and took a step back to look at it...I felt joy and more self worth.  If you haven't seen this YouTube presentation from Elder Uchtdorf called 'CREATE'- click on it!!  It will be worth the 1 minute 54 seconds it will take you to watch it.  One of my favorite people in the world is Elder Uchtdorf and his message is undeniably inspired.  Enjoy!

I didn't take photos of all my projects, but I am so happy I took a few. To the rest of the world these may not look like much, but to me and my family they brought us a few smiles.

My first princess birthday cake for Ashlynn.  I have a feeling it won't be the last one I make for her. She loved it, but was a bit traumatized when we cut it up and ate it. 

Made in honor of Luke's deceased pet snail named Snaily Pyster (pronounced PIE-STIR).  He was so distraught about losing him that I thought making him a t-shirt would help him feel better.  He LOVED it and tried to wear it for a week straight. 

Back Story: My mom is not afraid of bugs, snails, snakes, mice....or anything like it.  At her cabin in the mountains she saw a snake one day and ran around the front yard chasing it.  She wanted to catch it and show it to Luke.  My Dad, Ben and I all yelled out, " I wouldn't do that if I were you...what if it is poisonous?"  She didn't care and kept chasing it.  Luke's eyes were popping out of his head.  He looked terrified and amazed by what his Grandma was doing.  She caught the snake and showed it to Luke.  Forget the snake...Luke couldn't take his eyes off his amazing Grandma.  A week later I overheard Luke talking to a group of boys at my work.  He said, "Did you guys know that Grandmas are the only ones in the world who can catch snakes?"  Thus the reason for creating the t-shirt. :)  I love it.

8. Friendships Made In Heaven

     One of the things in life that has brought me so much unexpected joy is watching my children play, interact with and love their cousins. It is a simple joy that I never tire from observing.  I guess part of it comes from the fact I never had the opportunity to develop friendships with my cousins.  My sisters and I were always the youngest and lived far away from any of our cousins.  Sadly, I don't even know how many cousins I have and I can only name two of them!  This is not a tradition I wish to carry on.  I am so thankful my children know each of their cousins from both sides of our family.  They can name them all by name.  They worry and think about them.  They miss them.  They include them in their prayers.  They don't want to say good bye to them....these are truly friendships made in heaven.  I LOVE it!  Luke even made up a rule all by himself..."If cousins come over, then I don't want the TV to be on.  ONLY PLAYTIME!"

     For example, at the close of a visit with my sister and her family, we asked Ashlynn to say goodbye to cousin Avery and her brothers.  Ashlynn and Avery both started crying...a lot.  I (being clueless to this particular bond of friendship) kept asking Ashlynn what was wrong.  I asked her if she was hurt.  I asked her if she was fighting over a toy with Avery...and etc.  Finally, Ashlynn blurted out between sobs..."I'm SAD MOM!!!"  I was startled and couldn't believe my 3 year old was crying at the thought of saying goodbye to her cousin.  Ashlynn followed Avery out to the minivan...crying and hugging her all the way.  After their minivan drove away, Ashlynn ran up to her room, buried herself in a blanket, curled up in a ball, and repeatedly told me how sad she was. She didn't want to play or do anything.  The poor girl was needing some chocolate to help the situation!  It was sad, but so adorable.

7. Luke's 1st Day of School

I want to finish my Top 9 of 2009 by the end of January-so I better keep writing. 

Another wonderful thing to come out of 2009 was watching Luke go to kindergarten for the first time.  Luke was nervous-but I may have been more nervous.  When the time came to separate, I discovered I was more excited for him than anything and I didn't end up crying.  Luke started reading in preschool and he was more than ready to keep going with his new achievement.  It was making him mad that he couldn't read more than he could.  Every night he would thank Heavenly Father he was able to read and he prayed he could read even more the next day.  It was too cute. 

Here's a side effect of your children learning how to read:

After Luke ate all his Halloween candy in one night and became sick the next day, I wrote on the white board, "No more candy for the kids."  Luke decided he didn't like that message and he erased and rewrote the message to say, "No broccoli No carrots".  Since he didn't know how to spell broccoli or carrots, he drew pictures instead and added "I love Dad".  Later on when I asked him why he did it, he asked me, "How did you know it was me?"   Ummmmmm.....I am not sure....the next suspect would have been his Daddy! 

6. Two Trips to Cascade

During 2009 we were able to make two great trips to visit my parents in Cascade.  During the first one, my parents borrowed a pontoon boat and we had a wonderful day on the lake.  It was perfect weather and perfect company.  My sister Jaime and her family came too and we loved every minute we were able to all be together.  I can still remember how good the sun felt that day.  I didn't want the day to end.

     During our second trip we went canoeing, had a few great campfires and even tried a zip line at a friend's house.  Luke may be shy, but he is quite the dare devil.  He LOVED the zipline and insisted he do it with no hands every time.  I lost count how many times he went down the zipline.  I almost had a heart attack each time he did it.

     Overall, it felt good to surround ourselves with family and enjoy all the yummy food my mom makes. Our kids love visiting their Grandma and Papa. 

5. My Heart Dances With Her

Okay, I have to admit something.  I always thought people who put their daughters in dance class at the age of 3 were mostly doing it just for themselves.  Let's face it- what little girl dressed in a dance costume couldn't make her parent's heart melt?  Because of my preconceived ideas, I was very reluctant to have Ashlynn join a dance class.  Since she was 2, she had been telling me she wanted to learn how to dance.  I thought to myself, "You are 2...how could you possibly know you want to dance!" 

Well, I finally signed her up this past fall and she has absolutely loved it! She wears a smile on her face during every practice. A day hardly passes without her asking when her dance class is. She loves her girl friends in the class, she adores her teacher, she loves the beautiful costumes and she feels so good about herself. Every little girl deserves to feel that way and... it's great exercise!

Here is Ashlynn getting ready for the recital.  She, of course, had to wear her princess robe while she was getting ready and she loved wearing mommy's mascara and blush-a requirement from the dance company.  She performed in front of hundreds...yes, hundreds... of people!!!  I almost had a heart attack for her.  At first I felt really bad for putting my daughter in that position.  I naively thought there would be about 50 people in the audience.  Why didn't anyone tell me?  Ashlynn was a little stunned when she saw all those people, but she got over it and just danced.  Backstage she told me she wanted to do it again!    My heart rejoices in the fact she has this opportunity and that she isn't paralyzed by shyness and fear like her mommy.

This is her whole class.  Aren't they darling?  Believe it or not...Ashlynn is only 3, the youngest in her class, but the tallest one in the group!

4. A Visit From an Angel

No, this wasn't a visit from a heavenly angel, but it sure felt like it.  Last April was really rough.  There was an entire week my children ate fish crackers and cheesesticks for breakfast & lunch and then had cold cereal with their daddy for dinner.  I was a mess.  Although my children claim it was the best breakfast, lunch and dinner they ever ate-go figure!

My sister Jaime found babysitters for 2 of her children and loaded the other 2 up in her van and drove 6 hours to come to my aid.  Before she even arrived at my door, she had menus planned for the week and all the groceries purchased to make those meals.  She made yummy meals for us, cleaned my nasty house, entertained my children, and most of all let us know she loved us and cared about us. 

When the rest of my world seemed to walk away...she was the only one to walk in.  I think that merits the title of an angel.  She just happens to be my sister too!

3. Deer Man!

This is something that cracks me up everytime I think of it...because it is 100%  L-U-K-E! After driving through the Smoky Mountains this summer and observing so many deer, Luke returned to Grandma's house and quickly invaded the girl cousin's stash of crafts and.........

....invented the one and only....DEER MAN!!! 

Notice that he even made attachable pipe cleaner claws on his feet.  We informed him that deer don't have claws...but he was quick to inform us that DEER MAN did!  He even acted out a few moves that only Deer Man can do.  I guess if there's a Batman, Spiderman, Aquaman, Hawkman & etc....then why not a Deer Man?  I LOVE this kid.  He was put on this earth to bring us so much silly, pure joy.  I love his mind and his boundless creativity.

2. Family Fun In Tennessee

In early July we had a family reunion with Ben's family at a lodge in Gatlinburg, Tennessee. The Smoky Mountains are so beautiful and Ben has a wonderful, fun and loving family. We felt so blessed to be able to attend considering how far we have to travel with kids. This photo only shows Ben's family...but not his Aunt and Uncle, Cousins and their kids. I don't have a pic of everyone:(   But it was a joy to see them too! They are also so loving and FUN!

We tie dyed t-shirts, chased fire flies (which they don't have out West!), went to the most amazing aquarium, saw the best fireworks show we have ever seen, ate too much yummy food, enjoyed Mayfield ice cream, and best of all...watched our kids soak up much needed cousin and grandma time.  We really needed this trip in so many ways!

1. (Top 9 of 2009)-A Birthday Present on the Way

Our top 9 moments from 2009 will not be listed in any particular order...but I really do feel like this one needs to be first.  The rest of them will be completely random.

We are expecting a baby in 9 weeks!!!  We don't know if it is a boy or girl yet.  We are looking forward to the surprise.  The baby is due on my birthday, March 20th.  I couldn't of asked for a better birthday present.  We don't have any baby names yet....so if anyone has a few suggestions...that would be helpful!  Send them our way. 

2009 felt like the longest year-especially after enduring 2 different first trimesters (my least favorite...nausea, severe migraines, exhaustion & etc).  I can honestly say I didn't feel good for almost an entire year.  After I hit 20 weeks (October) and could feel this little baby moving, I have slowly felt like I have permission to be happy again.  What a blessing.  Our family couldn't be more excited about this little baby. 

Keeping It Real For 2010!

Last night I spent hours uploading 1300 photos from our camera to our computer. We hadn't done that since January last year! I guess you could call us procastinators?...maybe...but I think 'indifferent' is more like it. I recently reviewed my list of fellow bloggers and realized that many of them have also fallen off the 'blog wagon' and converted themselves mostly to facebook. I like facebook and blogs both-for different reasons of course. I loved blogging for a while until life got really hard. My mom always said, "If you don't have anything nice to say, then don't say anything at all." I guess that is what happened to us. I have mentioned before that part of 2008 and all of 2009 hasn't been kind to us. We had no problem saying good bye to 2009 and welcoming 2010 with open arms. To be honest, I have a few choice words for 2009, but I have realized some happiness had to exist at some point if we ended up taking over 1300 photos!

Even though blog followers are becoming extinct and their comments (which are always fun) seem to be even more extinct, I realized that my blog in the past helped me to focus on the positive and form a gratitude journal of some sort. I have been a journal writer since I was 8 years old and in some ways my real journal suffered from my blogging. I didn't have time for both. For 2010, I think keeping blog posts simple and short with a few pictures might be more beneficial than documenting every waking moment of my children...accompanied by 10+ photos at a time! I don't want my blog to take away moments from my children and family because I am spending so much time on the computer instead of being with them. To help me focus on the 'good' from 2009, I am going to individually post our top 10 fun, funny or enjoyable moments from 2009. These are the moments that brought a smile to my face, put a beat back in my heart and light at the end of the tunnel.

Possibly the Best Quote I've Ever Heard

Personal Radiation
"There is one responsibility which no man can evade: that responsibility is his personal influence. Man’s unconscious influence is the silent, subtle radiation of personality–the effect of his words and his actions on others. This radiation is tremendous. Every moment of life man is changing, to a degree, the life of the whole world.

Every man has an atmosphere which is affecting every other man. He cannot escape for one moment from this radiation of his character, this constant weakening or strengthening of others. Man cannot evade the responsibility by merely saying that it is an unconscious influence.

Man can select the qualities he would permit to be radiated. He can cultivate sweetness, calmness, trust, generosity, truth, justice, loyalty, nobility, and make them vitally active in his character. And by these qualities he will constantly affect the world.

This radiation, to which I refer, comes from what a person really is, not from what he pretends to be. Every man by his mere living is radiating either sympathy, sorrow, morbidness, cynicism, or happiness and hope or any one of a hundred other qualities.

Life is a state of radiation and absorption. To exist is to radiate: to exist is to be the recipient of radiation."

–David O. McKay, BYU, 27 April, 1948


(I think the majority of us highly underestimate ourselves-for good or bad....Just something to think about....Tanya)